12 hours and 41 minutes
I would be married in 12 hours and 41 minutes
The sound of the loud music pulled me from the solitary of my hotel bathroom and out into the bustling hotel suite where the music was at full blast,., the room was crowded with family friends dancing and trying to talk over the loud music.
It was a sea of black and white, the easiest wedding colors to print invitation on short notice. It was also the color of piano keys but I kept that to myself.
My mother was sitting
in the corner trying to smile whenever anyone looked at her, the tortured
widow. The colors also gave her an opportunity to wear a flattering black dress.
“Is she alright ?”
I turned to see Emile at my side offering me a drink from the private bar that had been pressed against the balcony to make room for
the pre-wedding party. My mother had insisted the more money she could spend the better
“Yes", I said, "This is actually the best I’ve seen her. Though this is the last place she wants to be, out in public”
My eyes tried to focus on the numerous moving bodies. I
recognized a few people. Many of them were my father business associates, they seemed out of
place without him there. A few even hit on my mother which she took in stride, I assumed that was the only reason they even showed up they were so quick to assume.
I recognized friends I had been close too, people who claimed not to recognize me anymore.
I could make out Claudia and Clarice dancing with each other I focused on how they whispered to each other occasionally looking over at me.
“Clara”, I realized Emile had been talking, “don’t let your mother ruin this for you.”
“It’s not my mother I’m worried about I don't even want to be here.”
"Clara"
"Sorry, don't worry about me, you should go back to Robert", I said gesturing Emile's date on the farside of the room.
I left it at that and turned to get away only to meet my reflection mirror. My mother had to hastily agreed not to have a photographer. She assumed I didn't want to many photos of my face. I ran my finger over the scars on my face.
Perhaps the damage wasn't as bad as I thought. With a huge amount of effort and dark enough lipstick I could have covered them up but I couldn't hide behind cosmetics forever.
I was so preoccupied I didn't notice Eleanor beside me.
“I can’t remember the last time you threw a party.”, she squealed
“My sister’s insisted.”,
“ I can’t wait to see you in your dress tomorrow.”
“It's lovely”, I said still distracted by my reflection
She pulled me on to the dance floor and I couldn’t keep my
eyes off my sisters. Through the crowd of moving bodies I could still spy them talking to each other.
What were they talking about without me ? Realizing I had noticed them they separated back into the arms of their husbands.
“Clara”, I jumped at my mother’s hand on my shoulder. I leaned down so she could whisper, “I know she is here and I just want to make sure she’s not with the other children.”
“What ?”, not quite sure I’d heard her.
“I mean she’s not with the other children, you promised ”
“Who mother ? Just say her name.”
She pursed her lips and attempted a stern look
“Just answer the question Clara.”
"No, Mother she's going on vacation. I won't make you look at your granddaughter if it bothers you so much."
"Not so loud, Clara", she snapped her italian accent getting thick.
I tried not to roll my eyes as I brushed past my mother and
into the hallway. The entire top floor of the Rochester Broadway Hotel had been
reserved by my mother, desperate to prove this wasn’t a shot gun wedding even thought it was.
I found it odd that the few people who agreed to come to the wedding had been at the funeral. No one dared mentioned Rainer arresting me, but apart of me knew they found our family troubles so entertaining which was the only reason anyone showed up.
Once I was in the hallway I could finally breathe
I found solitude on the long way down on the express elevator. No one to come up behind me, no glares from my mother, or gushing girlfriends asking why there were no bridesmaids.
“Simple” was the only answer I could give, I wanted simple but I would never get it.
I imagined the party in my room would carry on until midnight and for some reason I couldn’t stomach being around all the people who I used to be so close to. It was the fear of slipping up mentioning Rosalie, that I didn’t call my fiancé by his first name and my father, my goddamn father’s murder. . .among a million other little things.
+++
I stepped out on the first floor where no one would
recognize me. The hotel was only a few blocks from the university, I was tempted
to sneak into my close/office and fall
asleep. Maybe catch up on some work.
I sighed and felt around for my room key and headed towards the hotel bar.
“Mommy”
I wasn’t sure I had heard that right but it was the way she said it that I knew it was Rose. My eyes looked around the crowded hall unitll I could make out Rosalie coming towards me dragging Melody the elephant along. I didn’t see Joy anywhere.
“What are you doing here ?”, I asked picking her up, “You’re supposed to be in Cape Cod Christmas shopping with Joy”
It suddenly occurred to me she might have runaway
“We had to get the money”, she explained while running her
small hands over my long hair. She really did seem to hate her cropped hair cut, I would have to ask Joy about that.
“You’ll have fun with Joy”, I said reassuring myself more than her, “Weddings are just long boring parties for adults. Also you shouldn't run off like that”
"I know", she said plainly
I turned away so she couldn't smell the alchol on me.
At first I thought I was biased as her mother, but apart from her eyes and complexion Rosalie and I looked just like one another, almost strangely so. It would have been obvious to anyone that she was my daughter and if there were ever a time to tell the people I’d kept her a secret from why not now ?
Who cares what my mother thought ?
All I had to do was take her back upstairs and introduce her –
“Don’t even think about it”
Claudia had stepped into my path and seemingly into my mind. Just beyond her I could see Clarice but she didn’t get as close as Claudia.
“Mother told us to follow you down here and give you a warning. We are doing to much to make this wedding seem as normal as possible. We aren’t just a family we’re an institution. One with family values we don’t need anymore mindless gossip. You promised mother she wouldn’t be here”
“I know, Claudia”, I said knowing how the arts always had to suffer and apparently beg for money, “I just thought she could play with the other children-“
“No, Clara . Come upstairs everyone is looking for you.”, Claudia relaxed on her heels, “You know for a few moments seeing you with your friends and family again you seemed like the little sister we haven’t seen in a long time.”
Clarice nodded in agreement behind her.
“I don’t know what to say”, I said almost tearing up at the vulnerability in her voice.
“Just hurry up before Mother sends Derek”
She smiled and hurried back to catch the elevator before the door closed. Clarice offered a small wave to Rose before following Claudia.
“Rose, you’re okay with me getting married ?”
“Yes , they say that often times the best secrets are those kept by family.”
I thought about the way that she spoke it was just so. . .so.
“Where did you hear that ?”, I asked
She thought about it and pulled Melody under her arm.
“I don’t remember”, she said. though I knew exactly who had said it.
I walked around the lobby, my heels killing me, till I found Joy and Mr. Fierro sitting at the hotel bar. They both had their backs to me. He was writing a check and seemed to be writing down directions and a phone number for Joy. I looked at my watch it was almost midnight. . . it didn’t matter I wasn’t superstitious.
“I think you lost something, Joy”
Joy swiveled her chair shocked but faked a clam demeanor.
“Oh no, I saw you in the hall.”. she explained, "I knew she would be fine, she does like to wander"
“We are almost done here, Ms. DeLune”, Mr.Fierro said not even turning to face me.
I concentrated on Mr. Fierro’s hands as he wrote down an unfamiliar phone number on the directions he was writing out for Joy. I quickly committed the number to memory before he folded and handed it to her.
“Please be back by Monday evening, Joy”, he told her.
Joy hopped down from her seat and offered it to me. After a few moments I let Rosalie out of my arms and she skipped towards Joy. Once they were out of view I turned back to the bartender pouring me a very large glass of blush wine, my eyes were drawn to the label.
I watched the rose colored liquid settle into the glass
“Is something wrong ma’am”, the bartender asked noticing my gaze
“No, it’s my favorite actually.”, I hooked my heel around Mr. Fierro’s chair turning it so he was facing me, “Thank you”
“You’re welcome, Ms. DeLune.”
“I wish you would at least speak with my mother.”
“What for ? I hardly plan to speak to her after this.”
“Perhaps if she knew what kind of person you were, she would let Rosalie back into the family”
"It doesn't matter what kind of person I am."
"Well it does to her"
"Ms. DeLune, the very fact you disagree with me on every matter does not bode well for the future."
"What do you want me to do about it ?"
"Not speaking would be an admirable start."
For the first time that night his eyes met mine, he reached out and ran his thumb over my cheek and just below my lips. I was't naivee enough to think he would kiss me.
“Look at you Ms. DeLune” there was a slight bit of mockery in his tone, “Often times I barley recognize you. You ,appear so tired, anxious and often times. . .”
I stoped mid-sip realizing he didn’t even have to finish that sentence.
“Nonetheless by tomorrow night you will be relived of your afflictions. Guilt manifests itself both physically and mentally with the weak. I look forward to you sharing the burden of your father’ s murder with me.”
“You still think I mur-“, I stopped as he placed his finger over my mouth.
From the odd angle I was able to get a closer look at the symbols on his ring.
MCMXXV MMV
In my head I could only make out the last number correctly as 2005.
“1930", I added up the first number, “2005? You have to tell me what the hell this ring is about.”
He rested his hands on my chair, pulling it closer so our legs were entangled."
“Ms. DeLune, you and I are not each others first loves. It is very important you don’t forget that. I had this made so I would never forget that"
"Made ?"
"Yes, from her ashes"
I chocked on my wine. Realizing numerous things at once. My grandmother's ashes had been in a memorial case inside the DeLune academy since her death.
"You stole my grandmother's ashes ? You were in Rochester and didn't tell me ?"
"All in good time, Ms. DeLune"
“I shouldn't have to spend the rest of my life being competing with her.”
“A little understanding, Ms.DeLune”, he said with very little emotion
“Understanding ?”, I was floored, a sad realization coming
over me, “You are wearing her ashes you have a picture of her on your dresser.
I don’t think you will ever be over your failed life.
“You simply misunderstand. When you’ve lived as many lives as I have it is vital to cling to a part of the past. I don’t quite think you will ever understand what it is like to miss part of an existence.”
I finished another glass of wine trying to rationalize this.
“ I suppose your memories of her and the past will fade, but I won’t.”
He looked up slightly amused.
“You clearly have not been in love before.”
“No”, I said softly holding his hand which he removed, “I haven’t ”
"I find that to be unfortunate."
"Please don't tell me I am not making a mistake", a nervous tremor went through my hands
"Ms. DeLune, if I could choose who my heart felt for it certainly would not be you. I simply don't have a choice."
He appeared concerned for a while and turned back to
the bar. I was still for several seconds trying to decide if he had insulted me.
+2+
Fall IN
The night could not have moved on any slower. Very quietly the bar emptied out. I was surprised
no one else came looking for me. Somehow over the course of the night I found
myself on the carpet dance floor with my arms loosely around his neck getting
lost in the slow melody.
I listened to his very slow breathes, suddenly aware of how late it was. Underneath my wrists I could feel the quickening beat of his pulse, it was so fast compared to mine.
I had tried not to think about anything but I couldn't seem to rid myself of my anxieties so I tried to live with them.
“It’s getting late.”, he said slowly coming to a halt. throwing me off balance
“I know”, I said, " I should go"
He took my hand and lead me out of the bar and to the hallway,
it was empty except for the concierge at the computer. I stood there a while not quite ready to give into the night.
“I want you to come to my room—“, he placed his room key in my hand
“I can’t people are waiting for m—“
“Tomorrow”., he finished, “A few moments before the wedding.”
“Oh, of course”, I said recovering awkwardly trying to find some place to put the key.
I looked back up to see an expression I couldn't quite read.
“Ms. DeLune I did not mean to upset you earlier.”
“I’m worried. I don't know why. . . I just am”
“I beg you not to be. Smile , I find it to be very beautiful.”
“I’m sure you have a beautiful smile too.”
“I’m sure”,
He meant those to be his parting words but I couldn't let go and we both stumbled a little.
"I-I suppose we've both had to much to drink"
"I'm afraid it's just you. I will need to be completely sober for what I am about to do next."
He kissed my hand one last time and made his way to his room on the first floor. I leaned against the wall for a few moments a smile still on my lips.
+++
Olive Rainer couldn't help but to grow weary on her days off. She hated to be one of those cops that was obsessed with their work but her mind had been so consumed with the DeLune case. It was getting to the point that she hardly found any other police work fulfilling. Sometimes during her days off she would shuffle through her father's old cases, it made her feel close to him.
Not today though, it wouldn't help with the DeLune Murder
It was to cold for fishing and all they seemed to show on TV were those terrible cop dramas. She tried to start on wrapping Christmas gifts for her family on the West coast but her heart was not in it.
Her mind constantly went back to Martin's murder and even though she wasn't on duty it didn't mean she couldn't call the family for friendly reasons. Just to see what her favorite suspects were up to.
She had known Mrs. DeLune to be talkative when she wanted to be, perhaps she could shed some light on the enigma that was starting to become Clara DeLune.
She dialed Clair DeLune trying to think of some excuse to get her talking.
"Hello", said an heavily accented voice on the other line, It was the housekeeper
"Is Mrs. DeLune there ?"
"No, they are all at the wedding."
"Wedding ?Who's getting married ?"
"The youngest daughter, I think"
Rainer bolted up from her chair, how could she have missed a wedding during her investigation ?
"Oh, yes of course. I called for directions. . . I lost the invite"
"Hmm, I thought they ddin't have time to send those out ? Let me see if I can find the address"
Rainer waited while the woman shuffled around. What the hell was going on ?
"It's in downtown Rochester, you have to tell me how it goes kind of strange, huh", the housekeeper said with a laugh
"Why is it so strange ?"
"Well from what I can tell the family's never met the man. If Mr. DeLune were still around, God rest his soul, he would not have stood for it. I'm assuming the man has money"
Rainer kept the phone tucked on her shoulder and began digging through
her closet for a a dress, her thoughts going back to what Juliet had
said about the man in the eight sketch. If Clara was in love with the stranger it stood to reason she was marrying him.
A name, all Rainer needed now was a name.
"I'm sure", Rainer said pulling her hair out of a ponytail
"let me get the directions for you"
As soon as she had scribbled down the address Rainer threw on the only dress she owned and floored her gold sedan to make it to Rochester in time. She never regretted living in the country until now.
Meanwhile a woman walked into the Rochester precinct with her head down. She was
a simple woman, impressionable, weak perhaps and religious as of recent. The guilt had culminated
and this was her only way out.
No one recognized her as she walked in, no one except Juliet Wakefield who instead of acting, watched as the woman approached the front desk.
"Can I help you ma'am ?", the desk Sargent asked
"Yes, I-i'm guilty"
"Guilty of what ?", the officer was frustrated, he thought she was just another crazy person looking for attention.
"M-Martin DeLune, I did something terrible. . . It's all my fault. I-i'm so sorry."
"Excuse me", Juliet said., "I'm working on the DeLune case."
"You are ?", said the woman
"Yes, I"m a consultant. I've known about you for a while. . . what's your name ?"
"Ella Stanfield."
The name of the woman in the 9th sketch
"Yes, Ella. Mr. DeLune has mentioned you."
"What do you mean ?"
"I'm a psychic . I know he doesn't want you to feel guilty about what happened. Why don't you tell me what happened and maybe I can help you."
"I'll go to jail.", Ella whispered
"You won't if you have a good reason. I'm working on the case I'll put a good word in for you. I have friends in high places"
Juliet was optimistic, she had come to the station this early in the morning knowing something would happen and this was exactly what she needed to solve the case.
"Okay", Ella was strangely at ease with the young girl and she was more receptive than the older officer, "It started on thanksgiving. . ."
+3+
warm whispers
It was a simple white dress covered in eyelet lace and flared out just above my ankle so I would be sure not to trip. It was far to tight along the top but there was no time for alterations. I slipped on the matching jacket and concentrated on putting the wilting white rose in my hair.I sat infront of the mirror for a long time, not really looking at myself. I tried to convince myself that this wasn't something to be nervous about. This wasn't just about my father, it was about everything else.
It was inevitable. . . what other choice did I really have, maybe we were always destined to be together.
My mother's and sisters were probably in the main hall entertaining the guest and trying to pretend like father wasn't missing. I was happy to be alone and I knew if they were here it would be difficult for them to feign support.
I slipped on my silver music-note necklace I had received as a gift,along with the engagement ring I had never even worn till today. It was heavy and I doubted I would ever get used to it.
22 minutes and counting
I remembered Mr. Fierro's request from last night and I felt foolish for not thinking this through, fortunately my dress was not ostentatious that I could maneuver it on my own.
The halls were empty and the elevator came quickly, when I stepped out I could see around the corner as guest mingled in the hallway. I turned the other way towards the first floor rooms till I came to the room at the end.
I started knock when Emile opened the door nearly running into me.
"Clara", he said, "You look so beautiful"
"Thank you, you don't look to bad yourself."
He straightened up his black tie at the compliment.
"I really shouldn't let you do this ", he said, "but I'll be right back"
He rushed out leaving the door open
He kept his eyes low as he light a cigarette I walked slowly
towards him. He was always dressed well so it was difficult for me to find him more handsome than usual, even then handsome was not the right word.
Halfway there I turned on my heels so I was walking backwards.
I reached out with my hands behind me till I hit the back of the chair. I rested my hands on the side and took a deep breath.
“What are you thinking about ?”, I asked
“Nothing”, he answered
"Why did you want to see me ?"
“You can turn around”, he said , “I am sitting in front of a mirror I saw you when you walked in.”
“Oh”, I said realizing that I should have realized that, “humor me, then”
"Why did you want to see me ?", I asked again
He waited, saying nothing until Emile came back in with a leather bound portfolio, opening it to display a blank marriage certificate.
Emile gestured to a heavy silver pen that was sitting on the night stand. I heard Mr. Fierro's chair move and he was standing next to me. I watched as he signed his name without hesitation. I started small in order to fit my middle name and heisted at the last name.
How did i want to be known the rest of my life ?
"D", he whispered into my ear, "e-L-u-n-e"
I finished signing becoming unsteady on my heels.
"You want me to keep my last name ?"
"Yes, I know how much it means to you."
"Is that all ?", I asked realizing how close he was to me.
His eyes went to Emile and back to me.
". . . a beautiful and young bride, if I believed in luck I think I would consider myself so.", he remarked quietly.
i stood there quiet, not entirely sure who he was talking to. His translucent blue eyes taking in my appearance.
"Clara", Emile said breaking the silence,"you should go it's almost time."
"Yes,", I agreed turning away,"Ill see you soon."
"very soon"
Slowly the minutes began to tick away
+4+
I stood nervously as the warm amber light shone through the large windows of the lavishly decorated hall, seemingly lighting the way to the alter with it’s golden light. Infront of me everyone appeared like a silhouette lining the golden chairs.. I could just vaguely hear their breaths as the music began.
I found the nerve to follow the neatly strewn white and black rose petals. Everytime I took a step I had to remind myself to breathe, even though I felt as if I were walking on air or maybe I was hungover.I was aware of my eye lashes as they touched the short while veil. The way the stems of the black and white roses slipped in my hands.
I could hear the scrapping of chairs as a few people turned in their seats and the fawning of some of the women. I’d never taken a longer walk in my life.
After what felt like miles, I took the tiny step off the white fabric finally reaching the altar. I turned slowly on my heels meeting my mother’s cautious smile and Clarice’s watering eyes. Claudia was seated next to her stroking Derek’s hand.
The music ended and started again and I was listening to the comforting sound of the expedition and the introduction of the piano, the music alone seemed to make my nerves melt away. Then almost simultaneous the music started again in a low hum.
I kept my eyes on the door just of to the side, waiting for it to open. 
My breathes were becoming nervous as I very soon became acquainted with every silent member of the audience out of the side of my eye.. The song silently ended and another one started.
I felt slight tremors building up inside me but I kept calm, not moving standing there . . . alone
My lips trembled visibly as I heard the front doors open loudly and made out Emile in the blinding light. He stood at that base of the aisle and self consciously made his way down.
I blinked as a tear rolled down causing all the women in attendance to gasp.
Emile gave me half a hug and handed me a white envelope. I awkwardly tried to open it still holding the bouquet but he opened it for me and handed to me.
Dear Clara
I realize as I write this that you will never forgive me. It is my intention from this moment on to assume the title as your husband. Unfortunately I cannot celebrate it the way that you wish.. The life I left behind haunts me everyday a fact you refuse to understand
I’m sorry it had to be this way.
I love you Clara and I
know you will be angry. I understand I am disappointing you, though If you were to listen to me before you would not be feeling what I assume you are feeling now.
I have enclosed a key to our home and if you can forgive me I will be alone in the house tonight.
If you are wise you will forgive me
We have so much to discuss
AMF
No
No
No
I read the letter again mostly so I wouldn’t have to look up, a pair of tears passed my lips. I finally looked up to Emile and then towards what I assumed highly entertained audience. I bit my lip firmly and my neat composure fell and I was reduced silently crying.
Once the tears started they refused to stop and I couldn’t be silent anymore
I sat along the altar not able to stand anymore as Emile quietly whispered to my mother.
Somehow I managed to stand up and without looking at a single person I made my way out, as I left I could hear my mother and sister making excuses.
"An emergency”, Mother said,
“We’ll reschedule” she said
All lies I knew we never would.
Once I reached the hall The key to the house slipped off the letter, attached to it was a solid gold wedding band. I picked both items up up finally taking a breath when I was outside the cold air hitting me.
I rested my face in my hands when I felt a hand on my shoulder
I jumped at the sight of Detective Rainer.
"Sorry, I'm late", Rainer said
"There's nothing to be late for." I continued watching the cars go by
“Oh, I'm sorry”, she apologized
“Are you arresting me again ? Do you just wait for crowds to humiliate me ?”
“No, I wanted to be here. I was curious”
"I don't believe you."
"Fine. Clara can I show you something."
Rainer opened a folder and showed me a photo copy of a set of letters.
"Clara do you know who wrote these letters ?"
I held my hand out to hail a town car, one pulled up instantly.
“No.", I lied, "Can this interrogation wait ? Today has been kind of rough”
“I suppose-“
“Then please let me be.”, I opened the door and half stepped into the town car and turned back to Rainer, "Here" I tossed the bouquet towards her and slammed the door.
+++
A letter caught in Clara DeLune’s bouquet floated in the air and landed in the cold wet street just inches from Rainer's pointy shoes. . Rainer picked up the letter not even bothering to read it, the initials and the handwriting were all to familiar.
It matched the letters that had been sent to her mailbox
She looked up only to watch Clara's black the town car disappear around the corner. It didn’t matter Rainer needed to get back to the station.
She had a lead
Rainer cursed at herself for wearing a constricting dress to the wedding that never even happened. She flipped on her phone as she ran down the block calling the precinct. She finally knew who had written the letters and that was certainly a lead.
It was like a puzzle. One stream of logic can be used to solve a different equation
"Rainer", said the desk sergeant, "I'm glad you called We've got a woman here-"
“Listen, I know who wrote the letters”, she shouted to the phone, “AMF is her fiancé and Cal is—“
Rainer stopped short as a car swerved onto the sidwalk, with force the door slammed into her, knocking her out cold. She held on to consciousness for a few seconds as the car screeched and veered down the street.
A/N
Next comes the part of the serial where answers are given, I promise. A while a go a commenter mentioned liking an "darker" Clara and in this chapter it's mentioned that one of the reasons she seems that way is because she is becoming an alcoholic.
Well, I guess that's all the explaining I have to do.